A Random Pattern

I had a relaxing weekend. Part of which involved setting up blogs for children. There were … a lot of questions. As you might imagine. WordPress has a lot of moving pieces, but it was remarkably easy to get them up and productive. Watching what they create has been really fun.

Of course now I have to teach them to keep it up. Because, you know, I’ve been setting such a great example here … *ahem* …

Speaking of which, I was explaining the idea of draft posts. Using my blog as a handy illustration, I discovered I’ve got 41 old drafts hanging around! Some of them are even still interesting.

No promises though. I’m just being honest.

The site is up and working again. It has been … wow, a long time since I posted. Would love a style update, but this will have to do for now.

Lots of nerdy things brewing…

Now is a good time to mention “word wars”.  Word wars are useful tools during the frantic month of November, when 1600+ words a day are required and time, family demands, and everything else collide.

Set a timer for 5, 15, or 30 minutes, challenge someone else, and see how many words you can get written.  Leave everything behind – grammar, punctuation, spelling, perhaps coherent sentence structure – but get that wordcount.

The section below is from one of many word wars.  Because of that, even though I’ve done some basic editing, it is a little confusing.  Hopefully you can still enjoy:

As tension was rising within the group, they nearly encountered [BC1] another Deeper traveling school.  They scrambled to change direction, but the Deeper community seemed almost to follow them.  They swam rapidly, trying to stay ahead of the quick-moving Deepers and the accompanying Shallower school above.  As they moved off towards one side, they found another, larger shallower school, with no real place to squeeze between.  Frustrated the four swam forward as quickly as they could, gaining a little ground ahead of the shallower farm.  But as they raced ahead, looking for a way to get off to the side before the ridge which was rapidly approaching, a ship and group of enforcers appeared on the horizon.

Alex frantically looked for options as they stopped.  Behind them the shallower school continued approaching, to the north [BC2] a larger school.  Underneath both, a farily [BC3] large Deeper community.  In front of them to the south, the Ridge, which would force the Deepers up and leave them very little room for even possible hiding[BC4] .  And passing directly in front and headed towards them from the east, the group of enforcers.  There was little time ofr [BC5] arguing, though each of them suggested a different tack.  We’ll split up [BC6] Alex decided.

“Gooshan and Xero, to the south, try as hard as you can to get past the school.  If you have to go over the ridge, try to make it through or find a group to blend in with if possible.  Good luck, we’ll meet you on the shelf.  Muuld, come with me, we’re going to try and go under the enforcers but stay out from under eth [BC7] ship if possible.  We’ll be pusing [BC8] our depth but hsould [BC9] be able to make it.  Everyone stay calm as you can, if you get found sing the slave song as we’ve discussed before and mimic the controlled fear of those belonging to a Deeper group already – afraid only of your owner deepers and not those approaching.  I pray for the best and hope to see you in a few days.”

No one noticed Daire was gone, nor had thoughts for him now[BC10] .  He wasn’t going to save them, not that they trusted him enough for that anyway.

Xero and Gooshan did as Alex suggested, and took off on a south-east tangent, swimming as fast as the possibly could, trying to escape detection and make it around – or under – the shallower school while escaping Deeper notice[BC11] .  They kept being forced to change course east to avoid getting too close.  Just as they seemed to make it south enough of the school, the ground underneath rose forming the ridge, and the Deepers began coming to ttheir [BC12] depth.  There was no room to get further out of the way – they were trapped.

As tension was rising within the group, they nearly collided with another Deeper traveling school.  They scrambled to change direction, but the Deeper community seemed almost to follow them.  They swam rapidly, trying to stay ahead of the quick-moving Deepers and the accompanying Shallower school above.  As they moved off towards one side, they found another, larger shallower school, with no real place to squeeze between.  Frustrated the four swam forward as quickly as they could, gaining a little ground ahead of the shallower farm.  But as they raced ahead, looking for a way to get off to the side before the ridge which was rapidly approaching, a ship and group of enforcers appeared on the horizon.

Alex frantically looked for options as they stopped.  Behind them the shallower school continued approaching, to the south  a larger school.  Underneath both, a fairly large Deeper community.  In front of them to the south, the Ridge, which would force the Deepers up and leave them very little room for hiding .  And passing directly in front and headed towards them from the east, the group of enforcers.  There was little time for arguing, though each of them suggested a different tack.  “We’ll split up” Alex decided.

“Gooshan and Xero, to the south, try as hard as you can to get past the school.  If you have to go over the ridge, try to make it through or find a group to blend in with if possible.  Good luck, we’ll meet you on the shelf.  Muuld, come with me, we’re going to try and go under the enforcers but stay out from under the  ship if possible.  We’ll be pushing our depth but should be able to make it.  Everyone stay calm as you can, if you get found sing the slave song as we’ve discussed before and mimic the controlled fear of those belonging to a Deeper group already – afraid only of your owner deepers and not those approaching.  I pray for the best and hope to see you in a few days.”

No one noticed Daire was gone, nor even thought about him right now .  He wasn’t going to save them, not that they would have trusted him enough for that anyway.

Xero and Gooshan did as Alex suggested, and took off on a south-east tangent, swimming as fast as the possibly could, trying to escape detection and make it around – or under – the shallower school while escaping Deeper attention .  They kept being forced to change course east to avoid getting too close.  Just as they seemed to make it south enough of the school, the ground underneath rose forming the ridge, and the Deepers began coming to their depth.  There was no room to get further out of the way – they were trapped.

Ah, and here it gets very intense.  The rest of this chapter, and on into the following chapter, is packed to the gills (haha) with …. Well, I won’t spoil it for you.

It has been fun to write, though sad in parts.  I will say shortly after this word war I realized that I’m going to completely change how the groups split up, and in fact mid-way through the chapter I just changed who was where, magically, with no explanation.  My poor proofreaders!  Anyway, this section has a lot of room for improvement on the re-write.

I hope you’ve enjoyed.  If you would like more excerpts, please let me know.  I’m drawing near the end of the first draft now, and anxious to be done.

Gooshan has encountered her long-lost friend, Thodn, from near the beginning of the book.  He is safely in another school, still a slave.  She decides to offer him a chance…

“Do you – do you want to be free, Thodn?” she asked quietly.  “It will be dangerous, but I’ll do everything I can to help you.  You can come with us, and they have some small safe places set up that I can get you to.   You can spend time quietly there, just learning and doing whatever you choose.”

“Whatever I choose?  You mean, whatever I choose from the options they give me.  Without leaving the area, and so on.”

“No, Thodn! You can leave the area.  You can go out on your own at any point you want.”

“I can do that now.  What kind of choice is that?  ‘Here, you can go on your own if you like, aren’t you free?’ Yes, free to die.  If I want to live, if I want to eat, play games, enjoy life, then I need community.”

“But Thodn, right now you don’t get any choice about community.  You stay in the school you’re in and hope to live out a long life there, if they don’t work you to death.”

“Do I really get more choice in the Invisible Remnant?   You’re still at great risk for death from Deepers, and the only difference is you’re working yourselves to death.  You’re free to pick community – from the Invisible Remnant only.  Which I have to imagine is small, and probably spread across the ocean.  Did you pick your companions?”

Gooshan’s thoughts turned red with a sudden flush of embarrassment.  Though she wanted to defend herself, she could tell this wasn’t going the way she had wanted.

"Oceans Die" Book Cover with author Stephen Christopher

Thanks to the generous pennythepants who is making covers for many happy novel writers over in the NaNo Artisans forums.  She(?) made me this lovely cover, which is encouragement as I struggle through the last 15K or so of my novel.

I’m officially one of many NaNoWriMo ‘winners’, which means I wrote 50,000 words in 30 days.  However, my story isn’t finished.  In some ways it is just getting started.  Right now I’ve set a goal to write the ending by December 19th.  After that, I will worry about the second draft… (*shudder*)

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…the other three’s thoughts rushed over her.  They had stopped cloaking completely.  She turned, looking for them.

They were doing lazy loops up near the surface, though not so near as to be easily seen from above.  At least, Alex and Xero were.  She reached out with her gravity sense and found Muuld, over against one of the walls, eating.  Her hunger pangs struck again and she swam over to join him.

“Is it all safe to eat?” she asked, eyeing him.  He was using some type of tool to scrape along the surface, pulling off plants and eating them.  Some he was also shoving into a bag.  “Wait, where’d you get that bag?”

“Ah, you’ve found my secret!  No, actually this is why Alex picked this location.  We’ve used it before, the Invisible Remnant has.  We keep a few supplies here.  Alex figured we could use the bag.  I agree whole-heartedly, the diet has been rather slimmer than normal lately.  We normally start out a little better provisioned.”  He realized what he’d said too late, and hastily tried to correct himself “Uh, not that we don’t ever, err, leave like that. Sometimes you just go with the flow.  I think the exercise and diet’s probably been good for me anyway, I’m one of the runners so I really need to keep fit and fast.  Surprises are good” he finished lamely .

I rather wish you could read the rest of this section.  I’m quite happy with it, needed edits notwithstanding.  This is probably the last break my hapless crew are going to get.  Unfortunately there are dark days ahead of them.

By the time you read this excerpt, my crew will have been forced to leave here early as well.  They may have lost and gained members of their group.  I will hopefully be nearing 40k, and also trying desperately to wrap up the story towards the big finale.

It is strange that 17 days into this daily writing adventure, I am still fluctuating – sometimes on a minute-by-minute basis – with whether I love the story, hate the story, think it’s an good, or want to throw it all away as junk.  This must be the joy of NaNoWriMo.  I wouldn’t give the adventure of writing it up for anything.  It’s been an immensely rewarding practice, even if I am exhausted at times, and consumed at other times.  Now if only I can produce something excellent out of it, I’ll be really satisfied.

She didn’t get a chance to answer, something pierced the water above them.  They both dove instinctively, even as they felt the cries from Muuld and Xero further up the shelf.

“What is it?  What do we do?” cried Gooshan.  Alex had already whipped around, a quick turn and rapid acceleration.  She bent her waves towards Muuld and Xero – Xero was hit with something, and was thrashing around in pain.  Muuld was working to severe some type of rope.

“It’s some type of spear and rope” called Alex.  “Stay far from the surface, they’re accurate with these things down several meters now.  There must be Grounders attacking us.  “I’m going up to try and get Muuld, you stay down there and try to help guide us.  I know it’s hard, but see if you can get any idea of what is on the shore from there.”  He bolted off, skimming on the bottom and changing direction every few strokes.

She focused her mind, travelled along the rope, trying to follow it all the way to the land.  It was actually rather easy, the rope was under a lot of tension and there were waves from the Grounders, filled with hate that enveloped it.  So she saw rather easily a weak spot in the rope.  “Xero, pull, swim back and forth going toward the rope, get a little slack!  The rope is about to break!”

“You’re crazy” Muuld yelled back.  “They’ll pull him in as fast as he can swim towards them.”

“How far up the rope is the damage?” called Alex.

Gooshan focused again, traversing up and down the rope.  There was a sudden cry from Xero.  “The net is caught on my hand! They’re pulling too hard, I can’t stop it!”  His waves were laced with fear.  She focused, harder.  She felt along the threads, focused her waves.

“It’s about 2 of your lengths” she called to Alex.  “But hurry, I think they might fire more shots at you.”  She kicked up to the surface and leapt out, trying to see what was happening on the shore.  It was dusk, but they had a fire and there were a few bodies silhouetted. One was holding something long.  “They have another spear or something!  Get away from the surface!”

Our band of adventurers, on the run and outside of society’s bounds, are getting into much more populated areas.  Turns out they have a lot of enemies, and very little in the way of friends.

Just so you don’t think the whole novel is filled to the brim with violence – they make better excerpts is all.  I’ll look for a more conversational or descriptive excerpt to bring you later in the month.

My novel is currently titled “Oceans Die”.  I expect this to change again, but it will do for now.  It is 32,000 words long, or 88 paperback pages.  See the sidebar for my daily wordcount progress, which has gone swimmingly.  Still, this story’s not going to fit comfortably in 50k, and I want to be done by end of November with the first draft.  We’ll see how it goes…

They’d had a very uneven eating schedule since going on the run. He didn’t see that changing anytime soon, sadly.  Still, maybe he could have a meal ready when she woke up.  Looth nosed around near the bottom, looking for some clam shells or something they could eat.  There weren’t really any edible plants in the nearby area – at least not anything he recognized.  Then again it’d been awhile since their last ‘northern island’ plant instruction session, he thought wryly.  Like never, heh.

Tood and Muuld stayed still, watching carefully.  These two were definitely alone.  Could they be trusted?  They seemed helpless enough – almost too helpless, to be honest.  Muuld quietly mused “you know what confuses me?  They must’ve swam from that Shallower community that is just moving in, right, yet they don’t seem to be thinking twice about trying to go back and sneak in?!”

“They can’t be from that school” Tood said decisively after thinking on this for a few moments.  “Look at them, they’re exhausted and everything they’ve got with them is torn to shreds.  They’ve been on the swim for a lot longer than just a day.  They seem to have no idea what they’re doing out here though.  That bothers me.”

“Shall we introduce ourselves, or do you think we should get some racers ready in case they flip out ’n’ flee?”  Muuld wouldn’t mind a little excitement really…

My novel now weighs in at 19,161 words, or somewhere around 46 pages.  With this excerpt, I finally launched into the main arc of the story (which I only figured out on Sunday, two days ago).  This should carry me all the way to my final confrontation or climax, near the end of the book.

Thanks to my brother Bryan, who is providing these excerpts and giving me a lot of valuable feedback.  Thank you also to my other friends and family who are following along with interest – I hope it is rewarding for you.  So far this experiment, this mission, has been well worth the price of admission to me.  I’m not sure my wife quite agrees yet, so I still have my work cut out for me.

Oh, if any of you feel like designing a book cover or some related artwork, let me know.  I’d like to have some visuals to both encourage me and give all of you something for following this faithfully, and some great art would be just the thing.

Another presence was below them. They had felt the blast of bubbles, the brief shift in temperature. Someone had come up. More unsettling, He (Gooshan was sure it was a He) wasn’t even cloaking his thoughts much, which they were more than capable of doing. It was a Deeper, a large one, if young. He was practically pacing, swimming in large laps somewhere down near the elevator.
“How close are we?” Thorn called to the loaders.
“Two fins short of the close line” came the answer from one of those tasked with calling a finish on the load. Thorn and Gooshan were thinking the same thing – can we close it early and take it down? Will that upset him more? Thorn had eased off his line some. Gooshan didn’t sense it quite as near breaking now, but the side of the case was listing and swinging dangerously without Thorn there to fully damp the motions.
The next moment brought their worse fears upon them. Thorn tried to slow the pendulous motion, and his thread snapped completely. As he shot 40 meters away with his net, the load began pulling them all down. Loaders scrambled free for their lives, and everyone had given up damping their waves of panic as they all fled . They would have felt the sinister wave of the Deeper below them, were it not for his sudden physical presence. A blast of cold water rose with him as he caught both the crate and everyone near it with his forehead and upper back. Those loaders who hadn’t scrambled clear, easily 10 or more, were knocked unconscious. Some, probably worse, Gooshan thought detachedly. She was frantically moving, already 1000m clear of the area.

The Deeper was enjoying this…

Raw and unedited for your reading pleasure – gotta love first drafts.

Check out National Novel Writing Month (and my profile there) to see what I’m on about this month.

On Twitter the other day I saw the opportunity to review Carolyn Arends‘ new album, Love Was Here First.  Let’s just start with the understanding that she is one of my favorite songwriters of all time.  Lately I’ve been busy with so many things, from running the soundboard at church to websites and programming, and I’ve rarely stopped to just listen to new albums.  This was a chance not to be missed.

I care because Carolyn Arends was one of my early inspirations for writing. Her first songs (from I Can Hear You) were jam-packed with goodness, lovable for their hooks (both melodic and lyrical) and for their clever presentations of insights. My wife and I dated to the tunes of Feel Free, so it’s always fun to check in with one of our favorite artists a little further on and see what life has brought both us and them.

I really like the musicianship on this album.  Lots of hooks, Carolyn with her trademark voice and melodies, enjoyable and quirky production choices with everything from handclaps to brass band and beyond – and it works with very few exceptions.  Every song brings something different, but they all have Carolyn’s familiar melody style in the mix.  The album overall seems fairly subdued though.

Several songs have a gospel feel. She retains her folk and quirky way with words that first drew me in, though this album hews more traditional and simpler than her early albums.  So much of her chosen topics match what I’m learning and relearning now, so maybe I need less cleverness and more living what I’ve already learned.

Standout tracks for me: Willing, Be Still, Something Out of Us, My Favourite Lie. I’ll stop there before I find reasons to list them all.  Did I mention Willing?  If you like Carolyn Arends, or christian folk, or thoughtful lyrics, give this album a listen.  Better yet, give it several listens, this is definitely an album that grows stronger and deeper the more you listen.

Notes by song (or just go buy it and listen yourself):

Be Still – Great, bouncy start with solid lyrics.  I’m glad this one is on first, it’s full of energy.

Standing In the Need of Prayer – Rework of a classic, but if you sung this growing up, I think you’ll like the plaintive version created here. The spirit of the original spiritual is captured fully here.  If you are in the car, it’s ok to sing along.

My Favourite Lie – I really like the pace of the verse lyrics.  She does it without getting breathless.  I can’t explain it so much as just say that I really enjoy it.

Something Out of Us – brass/big band sound, initially thought maybe a little cheesy – but then a minute later caught myself bobbing my head, jamming, enjoying the happy, bouncy tune.  Try to listen without whistling or humming along, I dare you.

Willing – This is the standout track for me.  Artists have the freedom to say out loud with their songs things that we don’t always dare even think.  Sometimes they succeed at capturing something that many people feel but don’t have words to express.  This is one of those times, where the lyrics and the music will resonate deeply with almost anyone who stops to listen.   A contemplative song steps out into the chorus willingly.

Roll It – funky production of a gospel song with lots of country thrown in. Fun, nothing really new here but if you like her style you’ll still enjoy it.

The Last Word – Slower song, but with a really strong chorus.  I so love the message and mental picture – Love was here first.  So good to remember this after being inundated with the news these days, all the pain and sadness and terrible things in our world.  Love’s gonna have the last word.

According to Plan – slow, carries me along.  Great unwinding music, really puts me at peace. Backing choir and vocals, electric guitars and strong licks give it a bigger feel than some of the other tracks.

Nothing Can Separate – Straightforward, nice melody. I liked the musical interlude on this as on many songs.  I’m not a musician but I definitely enjoy the talent of the players on this album.

Never Say Goodbye – The instruments on this track are quite a departure, as is I guess the subject (dealing with someone’s parting).  The melody and vocals are still the lovely, distinctly Carolyn, but the production kind of caught me off guard.  It seemed to distract from the chorus for me.  I’m going through this right now with someone in our church though, so this was a strange song to evaluate.

Love Was Here First is a mature outing.  It is contemplative, and doesn’t feel the need to be clever in every turn of phrase.  There are some great surprises, and the strong upward pull that excellent music has.  I look forward to listening to this on repeat for awhile.

Full Disclosure: I was given the album in exchange for the review. The only request was for 200 words, a link to the album, and my honest, unbiased review, which I’ve tried to provide above.  Not sure this disclosure is necessary but I admire transparency.  I can’t write under 200 words anyway, ask just about anyone.